Tammy,

The other day you caught me grimacing during a pose and told me to breathe and smile.  Why is breathing given such a big focus in yoga?

When you’re concentrating on your breath, you fail to take life for granted.  You fail to worry that you’re doing triangle pose wrong and you fail to care that your shorts are riding down and someone might see a small part of your butt.

Right now I’m in your level one class so I’m just concentrating on achieving some semblance of the basic poses and simultaneously breathing smoothly.

In the advanced yoga classes do they teach multi-tasking like breathing and thinking?  How can I grow into a mature yogi if we continue to do the happy baby pose?  Let’s start practicing the snotty teenager pose; my sense of humor might fit in better.

Is it possible we concentrate our thoughts on each breath so we live life in the moment, here and now?

Gary Kahn

Tammy,

The other night in class you came over to my mat and looked at me and asked, “How did you get into that mess from what I demonstrated and described?”  You laughed at me.  I laughed at me.  Yeah, I try as hard as I can, but come on, yoga’s funny stuff.

Let’s take melting heart pose (anahatasana)?  It looks like you’re a centipede moving slowly along, with your butt in the air all the time.  Maybe it’s the new way to search for hidden coins on the beach.  Or maybe you’re trying to find a contact lense.

How about prasarita padottanasana a/k/a wide-legged forward bend.  Maybe if you’re being inducted into a college fraternity you should practice this pose.  “Thank you sir, may I have another.”  I think this pose is actually a tribute to Douglas C. Niedermeyer from Animal House.

What about mermaid, I mean fish tale pose?  If a woman ever wants her guy to feel feminine like she is, ask him to get into this dainty pose.  After the pose, trust me, the guy will be running to the doctor to check for low testosterone levels.  If he doesn’t feel that way, tell him next Halloween he’s dressing up as I Dream of Jeannie.

I laugh at this stuff and some emails may seem like I complain about various things yoga, but it’s all good fun that keeps me going back.

Cheers and I look forward to our next adventure.

Gary

Tammy,

Today one celebrates Valentine’s Day and exchanges romantic gifts with his/her special person.

What does everybody do for his or her self?  No, I’m not referring to anything pornographic.  In class you generate an atmosphere of silliness, acceptance, and wacky places where we’re supposed to put our various body parts which you call poses.   You ask us to focus our mind.  You ask us to look into our souls and love the person in the mirror exactly the way we are, right?  Does it matter exactly how we do the pose?  I think you adjust us to make the body feel better, rather than worrying about whether the body looks perfect, right?  So by following your directions to breathe in the moment and be present, are you showing us how to give ourselves presents?  Does that make you Saint Valentine and us students your little cherubs?  Thank you.

If you don’t mind, I will not be wearing red for class today.  I may be in the present but I don’t think others would take me seriously as Cupid in warrior I or warrior junior, or as you say warrior II.

Gary Kahn

Tammy,

So I’ve had some sort of virus for a while now.  It has forced the cancellation of a trip to New York, interfered with work, and halted yoga classes.  I’ve resorted to looking online at yoga things; one might call me a yoga lurker.  No, not dirty stuff, just compelling like a crack addict needs a fix.  I know reading about the experience of others and how they do things is not good for me.  It’s supposed to be about me.  For once, it is all about me.  Alas, I have figured it out; yoga is an activity for narcissists.   After all, I’m not supposed to worry about the way others practice.

Do you think this sickness has messed with my brain or am I more enlightened?

Gary Kahn

Tammy,

I was on my way to the beach recently.  Being that we are in South Florida and it was the holiday season, a lot of tourists from cold weather states had the same idea.  The traffic was heavy but not quite reaching LA Freeway levels.  Rather than inch my way forward at every stop, several times I allowed cars from side streets to move in front of me in line.

This is not like me.   Normally I ignore them.  After all, I am from the Northeast.    In the past, I would occasionally make up a story about how drivers on side streets are late for an important meeting or how they are going to the doctor for an urgent medical problem.  Not letting them cut in would bring a smile to my face.  After all, I plan ahead and so should they.  Do I go as far as road rage?  Nope.  I learn from my elders. You see, I have an octogenarian neighbor who got three months in jail for brandishing a gun at another vehicle.

Why did these out-of-body experiences occur?  Are you rubbing Zoloft into my system when you message my head during shivasana?  Is the shoulder stand calming my nervous system (pun intended).  Have I been sweating so much in your yoga class that my aggressive impulses are transforming into good kharma?

Gary Kahn

Tammy,

While out of town last week I took a couple of yoga classes.  I was the big dog as I was the youngest and most flexible.

So today I felt quite confident and went to your class.  As usual, you were serene and glowing.

It was a small class so you announced that we would go a little faster today.  First you giggled at my triangle pose and hinted that it looked more like a trapezoid; you had never seen anybody do that before.  Don’t worry, the Guinness book of records didn’t come calling.  When we were going into happy baby pose, I could see you were going to help me; however, the look on your face told me you had never seen a new born this sweaty.  You held your nose and sprinted to help somebody else.  Well, I’d been doing downward dog for many, many months so I thought l could ace at least one pose.  Nope, my but wasn’t high enough; after all we are in Boca Raton.

Gotta hand it to yoga:  go in feeling cocky and come out with your thong in a wad.   Sometimes in class you tell us we should be happy and feel lucky; we have the luxury to be doing yoga.

Gary Kahn